The Case of the Stinky Scarfie
by itsyourfaultstars
Summary: Mark is upset. His poor Scarfie has been violated by none other than Joanne! However, he refuses to wash the precious scarf. Can Roger help, or to say, force him to stop being a crazy and wash the thing? Probably will be a twoshot. Rated T 'cuz it's RENT.


**The Case of the Smelly Scarfie  
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**This is my first RENT fic. :) I don't own emotion, or RENT.**

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><p>Mark was pacing around the apartment, and he seemed like he was waiting for something. Or perhaps he was thinking, or had lost his camera. If he had lost his camera, he wouldn't just be walking around. He'd be screaming his head off looking for it. So, he probably hadn't lost his camera. Collins was out with Angel. Maureen, Joanne, and Mimi were out shopping. Roger was shut up in his room playing his guitar. Mark paced his footsteps so they matched the notes as they floated out in harmony and out-of-tuneness into the living room. A few minutes later, Roger revealed himself.<br>"What's up Mark?" Roger said with a grin.  
>Mark returned his grin halfheartedly. Roger frowned.<br>"What's the matter with you?" he asked.  
>Mark shrugged, still walking around the room. Roger watched him for a second or two, and then stepped in front of him to make him stop.<br>"Seriously, dude. What's wrong?" Roger asked.  
>Mark sighed.<br>"Yesterday, you know, we were hanging out at the Life Cafe, right?"  
>Roger nodded, thinking. He couldn't recall anything bad happening yesterday. Just a normal meal with all their friends in which they couldn't pay, which resulted in the owner refusing to ever serve them again. Of course, they'd come back later. Mark continued talking.<br>"So, I was talking to that Joanne chick, right? And then she's like, drinking something alcoholic smelling. And then she goes and spills it! She spills it all over me! And I smelled like I was drunk! _And I was not drunk!"_  
>Roger stared at Mark as he ranted. Since when was Mark such a wimp?<br>"So, I went home and took a shower to scrub the smell off me, because I felt contaminated. _Really contaminated._"  
>Roger nodded again. Mark went straight to the bathroom yesterday after they got back. So that explained it.<br>"So I tossed my clothes in our laundry pile, right? But...there's just _one_ thing I couldn't toss in the laundry! I couldn't, Roger, I couldn't!"  
>Roger groaned as his eyes flickered immediately to Mark's scarf.<br>"Your scarf? Come on Mark, it's just—"  
>"SCARFIE IS VERY PRECIOUS. Maureen gave it to me when we first met, you remember, don't you Roger?"<br>"I thought you were over Maureen." he said with a smirk.  
>"Shut up."<br>Roger shrugged.  
>"So why are you so upset then?"<br>Mark fumbled with his scarf and took it off. He dangled it right in front of Roger's nose. Roger instantly smelled the smell of, well, alcohol. Apparently Joanne really spilled that drink all over him. Somebody was clumsy.  
>"YOU SEE ROGER? JOANNE MADE MY SCARFIE SMELL REALLY BAD! <em>AND I CAN'T TAKE IT!"<em>  
>"Mark, you've smelled that before. And you've smelled like that before, and so has the rest of the gang. I mean, especially on like, Collins. Why does it bother you so much?"<br>"BECAUSE IT'S SCARFIE! _SHE VIOLATED SCARFIE!_ SHE HAS TO PAY, ROGER!"  
>"For what, the two quarters you'll have to spend at the laundromat?"<br>Mark glared at him. Roger chuckled nervously and wished someone else was here to talk to Mark. Like a girl. Who was not him.  
>"No, Roger. She has to pay for ruining Maureen's present. To me! She must've done it on purpose because she's jealous!"<br>"Of you? Even though she's the one with Maureen?" Roger asked, trying not to laugh.  
>"That's right. She's sad Maureen never called her Pookie! She wants to take her jealousy out on my <em>SCARFIE<em>. Isn't that terrible, Roger?"  
>"Why don't you just go and wash it, then?"<br>"But I haven't washed Scarfie since...forever!"  
>Roger stared. Was Mark sure he wasn't drunk?<br>"You haven't washed it? _Ever?_ Hasn't it gotten dirty before?"  
>Mark shrugged.<br>"It's always seemed clean to me."  
>Roger seriously doubted the scarf Mark wore every single day was clean. Sweat, dirt, and whoknowswhat...geez. This was a problem. Roger knew what he had to do.<br>"Come on, Mark."  
>Roger grabbed the apartment's laundry basket, a roll of quarters, and Mark's arm and dragged him out.<br>"NOOO! Don't make me go Roger! Don't! PLEASSSE! I'm BEGGING YOU!"  
>Roger muttered under his breath about how <em>he<em> was the one getting _Mark_ out of the house this time.

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><p><strong>I have no idea how I thought this up. Anyway, please review! I KNOW YOU'RE READING. Don't make me sad. :(<strong>


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